The Profit Prophet

The great thing about history, is that we do NOT necessarily need to repeat it and many of the customs, traditions and idioms come directly from a history long ago forgotten. Like, did you ever wonder where the phrase "Piss Poor" come from?    A long time ago, they used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot. And then once it was full it was taken and sold to the tannery. If you had to do this to survive you were "Piss Poor". But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot. They "didn't have a pot to piss in" and were the lowest of the low. So....The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the1500s: Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were start...

This post is near and dear to my heart…puns! Below are some situations that we are really familiar with, but whose outcomes may make your grown! Please, please, please realize this is NOT for the faint of heart, but should bring you a chuckle no matter what day it is or where you are. ________________________________________ King Ozymandias of Assyria was running low on cash after years of war with the Hittites. His last great possession was the Star of the Euphrates , the most valuable diamond in the ancient world. Desperate, he went to Croesus, the pawnbroker, to ask for a loan. Croesus said, "I'll give you 100,000 dinars for it." "But I paid a million dinars for it," the King protested. "Don't you know who I am? I am the king!" Croesus replied, "When you wish to pawn a Star, makes no difference who you are." A mechanic once owned a dog named Mace. Mace had a bad habit of eating all the grass in the mechanic's lawn,...

An oxymoron is a combination of words that contradict each other. Here is a list of some...how many more can you think of? Let me know and I will add them 1. virtual reality 2. original copy 3. old news 4. act naturally 5. pretty ugly 6. living dead 7. jumbo shrimp 8. rolling stop 9. constant variable 10. exact estimate 11. paid volunteers 12. civil war 13. sound of silence 14. clever fool 15. only choice 16. deafening silence 17. black light 18. concrete jungle 19. tax free 20. unorthodox standard 21. stationary runner

1. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way... So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. 2. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. 3. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. 5. The last thing I want to do is hurt someone. But it's still on the list. 6. Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. 7. We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police. 8. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 9. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public. 10. If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong. 11. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. 12. War does not determine who is right - only who is left. 13. Be happy a thorn bush has roses...

While I keep a blog of quotations ( http://wordecho.blogspot.com ) I found these idioms, quips and idioms funny and an interesting spin on the obvious. Hope you enjoy them? 1. A day without sunshine is like night. 2. On the other hand, you have different fingers. 3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. 4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. 5. Remember, half the people you know are below average. 6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. 7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. 8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap. 9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture most people have. 10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. 11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines. 12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments. 13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand. 14. OK, so what's the speed of dark? 15. When everything is comin...