The Cow v. Ice Cream

Ok, here it comes again. The run up to the Presidential Elections of 2016 and now we will get bombarded with ads and promises and debates and more ads and analysis and polls, and yada, yada, yada.

Some time ago I read an article about a 3rd grade class that was being taught a civics lesson about the President and how we go about electing one. The presidential election was heating up and some of the children showed an interest of what was going on outside of their classroom. So, the teacher decided to have an election for a class president. The children would choose their nominees. Those nominees would make a campaign speech and the class would vote. To simplify the process, candidates were nominated by other class members. The class discussed what kinds of characteristics these students should have. There were many nominations and from those, tow students, let's call them Jamie and Olivia were picked to run for the top spot. The class had done a great job in their selections. Both candidates were good kids. Many thought Jamie might have an advantage because he got lots of parental support, were as the teacher had never seen Olivia's mother.

The day arrived when the two were to make their speeches and Jamie went first. He had specific ideas about how to make the class a better place. He ended by promising to do his very best. Every one applauded. He sat down and Olivia came to the podium.

Her speech was concise. She said, "If you will vote for me, I will give you ice cream." She sat down.

The class went wild. "Yes! Yes! We want ice cream." She surely could say more. She did not have to. A discussion followed. How did she plan to pay for the ice cream? She was not sure. Would her parents buy it or would the class pay for it? She did not know. The class really did not care. All they were thinking about was ice cream.

Jamie was forgotten. Olivia won by a land slide.

So, remember boys and girls, every time a candidate opens their mouth and offers ice cream most of the voting public is going to react like nine-year-olds. They want ice cream and they do not care who has to pay for it. The remainder of the public knows they are going to have to feed the cow, foot the bill, and clean up the mess. So, bottom line, if you are running for President, just promise them ice cream (or whatever the dessert de jour is), and have no answers for anything else, especially about the cow in the room.

Comments

The Moldy Middle

While taking statistics during my quest to get an MBA and while earning my engineering degree, the professors always emphasized the importance of finding the statistical mean of any population by using the Central Mean Theorem (a.k.a the highest point of the Bell Curve). As an engineer, this was essential in order to maximize throughput, minimize cost and waste, and ultimately make a better, faster, cheaper widget. A funny thing happened on the way to the dark side of marketing. I discovered that the only thing in the middle of the road was quite literally dead road kill. I do not know if you remember stores like Bradlees, Ames and Service Merchandise (just to name a few), but they all folded because the environment changed and they were caught trying to service the mythological “average customer.” Part of that change came when Wal-Mart began its juggernaut with the discount department store. Wal-Mart did two things right: 1) Focused on “mobile” consumers, and 2) Fo

The Rush to Bottom

I cannot take credit for these words of wisdom, and sadly I do not know who wrote it originally. So, I cannot acknowledge them by name but I can acknowledge their exceptional talent to get a message across with clarity and hard-hitting truths. Whomever this author is, I thank and admire you and take pleasure in sharing this with others! I have also included a video if anyone is interested in sharing it. “When the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great...but when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed.” An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer. The professor then said, “OK, we will have an experiment in this class on socialism. All grades will be averaged and everyone will receive the same grade so no one wi

How Much is Enough?

I have been thinking about integrity and honesty, and frankly should humanity even continue, but that is another thread. In my thinking, I keep coming back to the same question: How much or little cheating is enough? Or stated another way? How much of a lie makes you a liar? How much cheating do you have to do to be a cheater? How much do you need to steal for you to be considered a thief? How much infidelity do you need to be considered an adulterer? How much fraud to you need to commit for it to be criminal? How much of the truth needs to be changed for it to be untrue? How much shit exactly, does something need to have to be considered a shit sandwich? How dead must a person be to be considered murdered? How pregnant do you have to be to be considered pregnant? OK, the last two were off topic but the answer is “any”.. Any amount of lying makes you a liar. Any amount of cheating makes you a cheater. Any amount of stealing makes you a thief. Any amount of infidelity makes you an adult

The Profit Prophet

Search This Blog