The Profit Prophet

My dear friends…tomorrow the world celebrates in its many ways the birth of a baby that would make humanity whole again and absolve us of our sins. Many, many, many people have argued over, fought and died in defense of and belief in this be they right or wrong, but one thing they all agreed on was his message of love for humanity. So, in the spirit of love I attach this Fryday humor post. Essentially, the question “What does love mean?” was posed to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds. It is said that we are all born poets, as our mother’s hearts beat in iambic pentameter, but that the pressures and stress of life slowly chokes that ability from us. I wonder if it is true about love too? Do we all naturally know how to love instinctively, but slowly move away from that understanding? Hum, I think there is even a saying about this, “Let the children come to me, and do not keep them away, for of such is the kingdom of heaven.” Anyway, It seems these young ones explain and demonstrate this compl...

LinkedIn just published a list this week of the top 10 most overused descriptions their subscribers use about themselves. The list was aggregated from more than 85 million user profiles. While many of these may sound like great things to have on your resume, because EVERYBODY is saying the same thing, you actually become LESS distinctive and more run-of-the-mill. In order to be noticed, you need to be set apart from the Moldy-Middle. So, instead of using "generic" descriptors, use specific accomplishments. Example: Results Oriented: State, made over $50 million in sales / $10 million in profits for XYZ Corp in 10 months!!! Now that is results oriented. As another caution, no one really cares much what you did for someone else, what they want to know is what you will do for THEM, so state it. "I can increase profits where ever I go..." Get the drift? Now, do NOT lie, but just tell it like it is... Oh, as a word of caution, if you are looking for a job, stet ent...

We all are going to face our mortality, but sometimes having a good perspective helps. Hope you enjoy this Fryday Humor post? ______________________________________________ The couple were 85 years old and had been married for 60 years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies. Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade. One day, their good health didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven. They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet. They gasped in astonishment when he said, 'Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now.' The ol...

Paraprosdokian: Figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently used in a humorous situation. A paraprosdokian (from Greek "παρα-", meaning "beyond" and "προσδοκία", meaning "expectation"). Some of these I am sure you have seen elsewhere, but all are very funny, especially now all in one place. At a minimum, hope this brings a smile to your face.. ________________________________________ I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list. Light travels faster than so...

A friend of mine was forwarded the follow "eulogy" concerning a colleague and friend who wrote about the colleague's recently deceased, developmentally-disabled sister-in-law. Her colleague (Gail) comes from a high-achieving family (she's a Ph.D. and MBA) that values intellect and education. When Gail told my friend about her sister-in-law's passing and about her sister-in-law, my friend asked her to send her this letter. I was fortunate to have it sent to me. I found it well worth reading as it shows how wisdom does NOT always come with intelligence and sometimes the graces of life are bestowed to the humblest of individuals..to Anne Ruth! Thoughts about Anne Ruth Gail Golden We have come together today to mourn our loss of Anne Ruth Golden, and to remember and celebrate her life. Our task is a complicated one, because Anne was an unusual person. The Goldens are a family of extraordinary intellectual and professional achievement. We are lawyers, docto...