The Profit Prophet

May the hinges of our friendship never rust, Nor the wings of love lose a feather, May good health find those I love, And good fortune to those who love me, May any trouble that finds you be as short As your New Year's Resolutions And for better or worse, whatever will be, May another year be with thee....

I hope each and everyone one of you had a stress free, joyous, wonderful, beautiful, memorable Christmas time? I thought you would enjoy this Fryday humor post as Christmas is celebrated in many different ways, by many different people, and some of those people do not believe, and that is where a good sense of humor comes to play…Hope this brings a smile to your faces!!! The young teacher asked: "What do you do at Christmas time? A Catholic student answered: "Well me and my twelve brothers and sisters go to midnight mass and we sing hymns; then we come home very late and we put mince pies by the back door and hang up our stockings. Then all excited, we all go to bed and wait for Father Christmas to come with all our toys." Then a Protestant child replied: Well me and my sister also go to church with Mom and Dad and we sing carols and we get home ever so late. We put cookies and milk by the chimney and hang up our stockings. We hardly sleep waiting for Santa ...

Grab a cup of coffee or tea, curl up in a blanket and enjoy this story about the Spirit of Christmas. I thought this would be an appropriate Christmas post as it is one of the best stories I have read about the Spirit of Christmas, and whether you celebrate Christmas or not, or believe or not, you will enjoy this story. May God (in any form you see the Creator) bless you this Christmas and all through the year…enjoy… The old man sat in his gas station on a cold Christmas Eve. He hadn't been anywhere in years since his wife had passed away. It was just another day to him. He didn't hate Christmas, just couldn't find a reason to celebrate. He was sitting there looking at the snow that had been falling for the last hour, wondering what it was all about and just feeling a little sorry for himself when the door opened and a homeless man stepped through. Instead of throwing the man out, Old George as he was known by his customers, told the man to come and sit by the h...

Sometimes what is said, and what is meant are two different ideas and as such there are unintended consequences... as this short story demonstrates. A minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great emphasis he said, 'If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.' With even greater emphasis he said, 'And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.' And then finally, shaking his fist in the air, he said, 'And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river.' Sermon complete, he sat down... The song leader stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, nearly laughing, 'For our closing song, let us sing Hymn #365, 'Shall We Gather at the River.'

They say youth is wasted on the young. So, what are you doing to prevent wasting yours?   I wish I had this list 30 years ago.   Still, as Jonathan Swift wrote: “ No wise man ever wished to be younger."   Take these to heart. 1. Not traveling when you had the chance. Being you (young) means you have a lot less responsibilities. Traveling becomes infinitely harder the older you get, especially if you have a family and need to pay the way for three-plus people instead of just yourself. “There are three cures for ennui: sleep, drink and travel." --D.H. Lawrence 2. Not learning another language. Boy, remember how much you hated Spanish, French, or Latin in School? You will kick yourself when you realize you took three years of language in high school and remember none of it and English is NOT spoken everywhere. 3. Left a Bad Relationship Sooner If it is not working, learn to leave, but first learn to love yourself. We all think the relationship we are i...

Since Christmas is only 5 days away, I wanted to send you off with some good cheer. As you know the new diagnostics equipment out there is awesome, so much so it may give you results you never expected. Thanks Jim for the forward… and Merriment to All! One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies "There's a diagnostic computer down at Costco. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - A lot cheaper than a doctor." So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Costco. He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. S...